OMG ~~~~ last day of 2008 ~~~~ end of the surprising year and maybe a start of another scary year ? and getting pissed off ???

OMg today is the worst day of my life ... yesterday i chatted to this guy on the net and i ask him to chat on msn and i ask him what was his msn since my msn was having some problems ... and he ask me whats ur msn i add u instead, so i told him my msn was having some problem and he told me scare what msn only mah ... i was like so freaking boiled up hao mah ... if u say it is just a bloody msn than u give me urs right ? so after he gave me his msn i was ok lor we chat on msn ... he say wanna meet mah ... so since it was kinda of a boring day i say i dont mind meeting lor ... than he say he dont have a hp number ... so i thought maybe he really dont have one so i said it is ok u come to my block than u call me, so i gave him my number than i ask him why u dont have a hp he say long story than he say meet me than tell me ... after that when i ask him what time, he told me he cannot make it today ... i was like wtf ... so i thought nvm lor. than he suggested to meet today morning i say ok, than isay how to contact u ... HE SAID TO LEAVE HIM OFFLINE MESSENGES so i say ok ... and when i was sleeping last night, he pmed me but i was asleep how to reply right ? so this morning when i woke up i saw his messenge and i replied him lor. it was like 4 plus in the morning and he was offline mah so i left him offline messenge lor ... than i was out for breakfast and when i was back home it was bnout 9plus ... he was not even online hao ma ... and later when he was online bout 1 plus he threw the blame on me for not confirming that we were meeting today i was like OMG la !!! than i ask him u know how to tell me to leave u offline messenge than u dunno how to leave ONLINE messenge !!! i was like so mad and he keep saying alot of stupid reason which made me even more mad hao ma OMG la ! and the more he said those reason the more i get madder and madder !!

but anyway i dont wanna spoil my mood roar !!! *already spoiled dont wan it to be spoiled further* but i hate guys like this !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! roar !!!!!!!! really hate !!!!!!!!! oh well another boggey added to my boggey list ....

anyway today is the last day of year 2008 and after tonight it is a beginning of a brand new year 2009 hahah so lets welcome the new year with open arms and let what have happened in 2008 be it happy or sad be our sweetest memories or lesson learned ~~~~ hahaha hope that everyones new year resolution come true !!!!! haha and mine is to wish to everyone find their mr right and spent the rest of thier life with their mr right forever and ever till the world come to the end and also for my mum to prosper and be happy ~~~~~ ^.^ and that includs me toooo !!!!! hope my mr right will accept me and be with me ~~~~~ love u all ~~~~ and tc ~~~~~~ hehe

time to think of the hating years ahead

hahaha thought i am happy for my jie jie and kor kor but iam kinda feeling down... my death time is coming and nearing ... bu oh well kinda tired think bout it and going o enjoy my life other fullest for now =3 anyway last night i played mapel with friends so fun hahaha but kinda angry with the gm F5 hahahaha but oh well was happy and contented haha but oh well pass ler pass ler maybe going with friends again tomorrow =3

woot today was on mirc chatting again and i chatted to someone stayingat bukitpanjang and he say he knows a sotong( which is me ) he said that there was a rumour about me which was that i will say people on the main if anything goes wrong in the private chat haha well no way to say that it is not me but i will say yes i will do that but of cos i dont do it any how if the person were to be super rude, any how spread fake rumours and also idiotic i will do la otherwise i will not lul wasting time lor but oh well .... let it be haha moreover i am ahapy g lucky person =3

hiz time pased so fastandiam kinda bored with my back ground of sakura and lee shaoran so i changed it to this pic haha ist it nice =3 i like i alot kinda so mystical and beautiful =3 but h wellhopeu guys like my new back grund and congratulatonsto my jie jielinda ad ko kor andy =3 grates on ur first child ^.^ and to m friends out tere hat knows that i am a g@y i thats for still being my friends thought iknow it is kinda hrd t accept that i am bu u guys still acceptd me tnx alot love gys alot ^.^ adof cos mummy thanx for accepting who i am keke love u the most ~~~~ anbd thanx for reading my bloggy !!!!!!!!

CONGRATULATION TO LINDA JIE JIE AND ANDY KOR KOR FOR THEIR NEW BORN ^.^

woots hahaha, finally my maple jie lined and maple kor andy gave both to thier first child ^.^ congratulations !!!! hahaha so nice to have created a little life to this wondeful world ^.^ ps bout the late congratulations hahaha kekeke but oh well congratulations to u both ^.^ and kor baby too young to learn call u papa la hahahaha ^.^ anyway wish u guys a happy family kekeke

DARIUS KOR WHEN U HAVEING ONE HUH !?!?!? KEKEKEKE must jiao you wor kekeke hehe rush in to congrates them nia going to rest not feeling very well kekeke ^^ oh well than for reading my bloggy and thanx alot ^^ love u uys and my mummys =3

bored bored and bored ~~~~

hahha it have been a week since i have stop working hahaha and soon i have to look for another job but my knees are still acheig =( sian .... but anyway hahaha for th pass 1 week i have been resting alot hehehe and i am still getting flu as usual =) hehehe and also this few time i have fallen in love wth a straight guy hiaz ... why of all must be a straight hahaha oh well it is kinda sweet thought hehehe today he came and sleep over at my place woots so nice hahaha all i know he looks so sweet when he is asleep haha oh well hehe anyway he is a nice guy and also his family back ground is bout the same as me just that je is worst than me =( hehe i really hope i could be a important person to him and also one who support him alot hehe he have really nice character thught to ay the truth hehehe thats why i like him =3 oh well see how things goes lor =3 anyway now a days after i stop work and relax awhile i feel kinda mre relax and less stress =) and i am so happy and when at my free time i think of the pass few month i have suffered in my old working place haha kinda nice but stress and somemore got a B!tch there hahaha i love my da jie jie and my bro haha but i stil have to go cos it is really bad for me and my health is failing lor. so it is also good that i take this few weeks to nurture it and make it better and find a job hehehe oh well .... think i am going to relax and play game ^^ hehehe so i will stop here and continue the next time round =3 hehe love all my bloggy reader and aso my mummy =3 and thanx for reading my bloggy hehehehe thanx and take care everyone ^^ the moon is shining brightly tonight it is nice for us to hold the hand of our otherhalf and stroll in the moon light with the glittering stars ^^

yaya out of hellway and into the fallen realm of darkness

hahaha yay i quited my job... was really stress and tired.... i have tolersated for 2 whole months and fially i am out of the hell way ... such a relieve.... thought it is a relieve for me but my mum seems to be unhappy ... i tried all ways to apologized to her but she just put on a smile and treated as nothing happen ... sorry mummy that i have let u down again ... hiaz ... i cant seems to get things right dunno why thought i have tried and gave it all my best shot ... hiaz but also my health is also giving up ... keep getting sick ... dunno why hiaz .... even my knee is giving up ... walk too long and i will have blue blacks on my knee hiaz ... guess getting old ler hahaha... i feel so tired ... but i think i will be looking for a new job soon hehehe i hope to find one that is near me tooo so can go out with my mummy and rest heheheh and need not traveling alot and squeezsing the trains with people when going to work and coming back to work ... i hate it when going home at night my goodness the smell of man hood and sights of babarians .... my goodness u can se people keep forcing their way into the trains withot even caring if people in there fall down u know lol .... i hate it lor but at least i lasted for 2 months ... and finally i have lefty the place ...

thought i have left the palce i will still remmeber my good da jie and my close friend sean hahaha ... and also no least my nice lady boss aunty ann ~~~~ sweet lady hehehe who said i have a soya milk , soft bean curd and a tao pok under her hahaha !!! and guess which i am ??? soya milk LOL !!! cops kenna whack what ever also nothing left hahaha i agree but sorry la my health fail me ... trying to tune it but still lousy lol ... imagine birdnest should be good for us ~~~ but for me ~~~ the equation is > birdnest + me = asthma LOL ~~~ see la how bout chicken essence ? chicken essence + me = head ache and nose bleed =.=" sway right ? hahaha xD but oh well guess i am fated to be like that bah hahaha xD

haha so bored dunno what to do now ... guess iam going to slack abit than shower than maple hahah xD kinda bored lor LOL ok la i go ler uguys take care but hor visit the few links i have added kinda nice youtube video hahaha thought cute guys cant sing high pitch ? see the links and u will know thst there is some cute guys with powerful voices that are more scary than gals ~~~

tired and sick .....

haix time pass so fast and my health is getting weaker hiaz ..... recently after i fainted i have been getting flus and body ache hiaz so sian .... and further more as time past my day of death is limited i really wanna be a free soul instead of one haunting a place. hiaz so sick and tired i really hope to really leave and be free from what ever that is to happen ... i wanna be with my other half and spent the rest of the life in a peaceful and relaxing place where i can provide everything my mum wan and live a comfortable life... but such things seems to be so distanced.

oh well stop talking bout freedom and all. ok let talk bout what happen last few days. last few days i ended my friendship with a person(no longer friend so call as person), he is one person i felt kinda gross as time pass by. i know he have feelings for me and time and again i hinted him it is impossible for us to be together. and when ever he hinted me that he wanna be with me i hinted back that we are impossible and i told him dont think tooo much but time and again he is like so possessive over me. which i dont like cos in the first place he is not even anyone to me as i only treat him as a kor. time and again i told him and yet he just ingnore and escapes from reality. and the worst part is. i told him i hinted him, he told me he dunno that i hinted him, oh come on u know how to hint people and u dunno how to take hints ? further more it is like so obvious de hinting lor ... but i told him afew days ago i felt that we are not even working out as friends and so i say lets call it a day. he like so bloody childish. imagine, last few days he is like asking me to forgive him, and yesterday he told me this in his first sms and i din reply, " now that everything is clear already, you dont have to worry that you will send the wrong messenge again what. our friendship has come thus far. cant u ust forgive on account of the friendship we have ?" and the second sms which pissed me off, this is what he smsed me " anyway, you send wrong messenge i also cannot accept already. i am attached( to a gal that is)". u see how childish is his sms ? u believe ? last few days smsing me to forgive him and now he say he is attach ? even my ex say grow up lor .... i feel that he is like super childish ... pls lor ok go grow up la hor. i really cant be bother with such people. and the worst part is he dont even understand the simple sentence " pls do not sms or call me" cos he kept calling me again and again and smsed me which i am like so bloody irritated. and the worst part is that he told me can i spare him 10 mins yesterday, and the worst part he was waiting for me under my block which i am like wth. i wanna go buy things, hahah but i was doign work so i stay home and did till bout 7 plus and i fell asleep aand i woke up bout 12 plus and went to buy food to eat hahaha. but anyway. i am going to tell him the last and the final time on my blog.

TO WHOEVER I AM SAYING ABOUT, PLS DO NOT CONTACT ME ANYMORE AND I REALLY DONT WANNA SEE U OR WANNA TALK TO U AGAIN. U ARE GETTING ON MY NERVE, AND I HAVE TOLD U BEFORE WHEN I TELL SOMEONE VERY DIRECTLY IT MEANS IT IS THE END.

"A MAN LEAVES A BATTLE GROUND WITH GLORY AND DIES WITH GLORY "
"A MAN LIVES WITH PRIDE TILL THE DAY THEY DIE"
"A MAN WILL NEVER TURN BACK ON HIS DICISIONS"

so i really wanna tell u this, cheers to the end of our friendship, good bye to the time we had, cherish ur memories and its the end of our friendship ~

CHEERS ~~

hahaha OMG so late liao i better go sleep thought i am sick but i still wanna rest and maybe struggle to work hahaha ~~~ gooood night to all my readers and friends, love u alot mummy muacks !!!!!!

ROAR !!!!!! THIS SONG ROCKS ~~~~

hahaha hi all =) like the new song ? it is introduced to me by a friend =) hahaha rocks right ? believe it or not this cute fellow is singing it all, other than the gals voice in the ground hahaha !!! nice right ? hope u all will like it ^^ enjoy ^^

time to move on with a tired life....

hi to all my bloggy reader, haha sorry that i have no time to pose new stuff cos i am really busy with work and now adays my health is getting from bad to worsdt. especially my knee ... hiaz, i am not a sporty person but my knee is already CMI (short for for cannot make it). oh well guess it is fated hahaha. well 1 month 1 week have pass working at my new working place. well it is kinda nice and time flies but still i am really tired cos there is alot of back stabbers in my company especially there is afew snakes around who will try to push all the faults to me. but at least all i know is, if i do my things properly, there is no way people will do thing to get me into trouble. but at least i am proud that those invoice i did, non of the company call back to complain >.<

hiaz, now a days i am so tired, dont even have time to relax and update my bloggy. i manage to fnd a time now cos i just showered and letting my hair dry hehe, furthermore was on M.C and i have slept alot hehe so ya can sleep lesser hehehe.anyway working life is kinda tought and also study is kinda tought tooo just that the toughtness is in a different way hehehe. i really hope my life would be nice and peaceful but soon my path in life has come to a cliff that i dont wish to go ahead but have bbeen force to fall into the cliff. NS ... it is a word that i head alot where the government treat us "citizen" unhumanly and treat us like dogs . i always ask myself what have the government do for us that we must serve the country ? have they feed us ? look after us ? and when we need help have the goverment do so ? i am always asking such questions myself and also to some friends and all the same ... we counld not find the answer and the reason to serve ns... i think it is really a waste of time ... and also it is kinda unfair ... and further more going to ns is something i really dont like ... why should i go ? tell me 10 gooooood reason why i must go ? why must we be "own" by "someone" and be treated as mere "chess pieces" on a "chessboard"? and why must we be "dogs" to "someone" when they are not even providing us with proper "foods" ? why must we be "chess pieces" to people who dont even appear infont of us and let us do all the "fine clean jobs" ? all they know to do when we "dogs die" is give our parents "gifts" but they cant be even bothered to care bout the feelings of our parents. but i really cant understand why dont they be in our shoe ? and think ? why cant it be a self volenteery thingy but a compulsory ? if they feel that not making it compulsory alot of people will not join than they have to think of a way to make it attractive enought so that people will join and not make people to join with force... furthermore "a person can bring the horse to the river but it can never make it drink the water" at the end of the day, they dont train loyal "dogs" but only make more hatred, and further more that "some people" should think why alot of people is leaving singapore, for me i will leave singapore too cos i dont wan my next generation to suffer too. anyway now adays people say going ns is like a charlet. but mind me, people thinks it is a charlet is because they see only whats there when they are there but not things that are there when they are not there. they say the "dog training center" is serving very good food, ya of cos when the parents around of cos there is nice food but a couple of days later u see what kinda food u get. and also u notice one thing ? why does the "dog training center" dont allow camera phone ? cos they scare that some "dogs" will take video of what is happen inside and than put on the net and let people see what is happening inside. cos there is somethings, that only "dogs" inside the "dog training center" will see, will feel, will suffer but outside people cant. i personally feel that that " somebody" should do something about it. cos i personally feel that. if someone is to force someone to do something, the result of that something will not be nice but infact it will arouse something to happen.

like that day, it was deepavali (forgot how to spell). i went to my godma place with my mum, my god pa and my other godma, not long after we arrive my other godma's husbands friends(a old pair of couple) came and tried to mix with my god pa and they started to talk about all kinda things, than they started to about ns. i just act as thought nothing happen. but the part i really cannot stand is that old cocks wife. she said this " ai ya ns now a days is like going chalet. they serve such good breakfast. they pay 4 dollars for breakfast, 8 dollar for lunch and 8 dollar for dinner. they so goodlife. " at that point in time i wanted to rebark her. but i just kept my cool and walk away. i wanted to rebark her this. "aunty, u gal or boy ? u young or old ? u been to ns ? no right ? so STFU and dont talk big ! cos in the first place u dont have the bloody dick and secondly u are a farking old ah ma so shut up and dont talk big." i was like so bloody pissed that i wanted to spit on her. old ladies like her should die faster since they only know how to talk and no action, i guess she is the type "kong liao lan pa song" than when her own son go in she will call and call and ask how are u got kenna ill treat or not those type. she is the type who say for the sake of saying without feeling bout the others feeling. i reallly really wanna spit on her lor !!! roar should have did that... *regret that i din do it* tsk tsk tsk but old people like them will never understand us. before going in i already feel so stress. imagine when u are in it u will feel even more stress. and some of us really cannot take it till we get depression and some will even try to end thier own life. i already cannt take it and i really dont like such things. further more, i have really told myself i wanna enjoy my life for the next few month and let thing be as it is. but i am telling u all one thing i am not going to be let treated as a dog. if things really is not right i will tell them off. be it u are a stupid "dog trainer" or "dog training center manager" i will still not care. cos i believe every human have his or her own right. but i feel that it is really unfair for us. why must there be conscription ? tell me y ? i dont understand it lor if u really wanna have a army, than make it in a way that u will go and attract the citizen of the country to join and the best part in doing that is that u will have a loyal group of "dogs" that u can play with and toy around with. i am a person who dont like to be own by "someone" who have no blood relation with me and further more what have that "someone" did for use ? other than HELPING us spent our money ? u tell me ? anyway am really tired so am going to head for bed ^.^ any comments just shout it at my shout box ^.^ so take care all ^.^

i am just too tired to live on and carry on ....

by reading my title u should know that i am very stressed up and tired ... i really dunno how to handle things... just cos i keep getting sick , my mum keeps thinking why i keep getting sick .. know i have been a useless boy, and on top of that i am also a gay ... i just really cant handle it anymore , i just really wanna cry out loud but i cant ... i am so use to laugh at things and laught off my sorrow and till now i dunno even know how to cry any more, i am so stress with work and also all my problems and further more the thing i hate the most is already coming soon and i really dont wanna go for it ... i really just hope to just disappear ... all i have in mind now is to end my pitiful life ... i kept thinking of it, cos no matter what , if i live on i will be still the same, i am just a bloody idiot with just luck and dunno anything... like what my mum say, work also cannot , study also cannot, go army also cannot so might as well just stay home and sleep ... i really just wanna sleep ... and if can i wanna sleep for eternity ... and maybe go to the paradise of after life ... i dont wanna disgrace my godma jolin , my god mama dei and also my mum... but what i am is already a disgrsce to my mum and somemore now, we all work in the same company, what i do wrong may also reflect on this too, i dont wan it to happen, i try my best to do things nicely but it just seems that no one appriciate and also trys to find fault with me. everyday i wake up at 7.30 go to work at 9 and end work at 6 every day with out fail i will be attack. i ask people how to do thing, they will show me attitude only but for some nice people they will help me. otherwise they will try to feed me with wrong informations, or worst, what they do wrongly they throw the fault at me. and what can i do ? just quietly accept it and keep it to myself. i am like a stupid punching bag letting people to attack me. i am like so totally down. i feel so down and hoping to tell me mum my problems but sat the end. she din listen to what i wanna say, and she say that i am just lazy and trying to "geng". i dunno how to say. last time she told me why i dont tell her my problems, but i wanna ask is how am i suppose to tell her about my personal problems when she keep attacking me ? and by now she should know i fall sick easily but yet she keep telling me dont "geng" ok... i am like just so bloody upset and yet the rest of the day she keep giving my a bloody attitude and i just accepted it and kept quiet ... i just really dunno why my life is so bitter ... since young i always get bullied in school, i kept to myself, not telling my mum, i get mock in school cos i have no father, and now she say i am like this cos u have no father to teach ... and all i can do is listen and bear with what she say... in front of all my other friend i try to be cheerful and i kept quiet, some i dont even dare to tell them that i am a gay... afraid that i will loose them i just kept quiet. but i know if they ever know about me they will not accept me cos they dislike gays ...

today, it is the worst day of my life ... i tried to bluff myself off things but at the end of the day... facts is always facts that cant be change ... like what some people like to say, once a gay always one ... i am lke ya ... it toook me bout more than 16 years and count to try to accept that i am a gay ,on top of that it took me 16 year and counting to accept that i dont have a father and i have suffer 17 years of mocking and being bullied. and what i do, i just kept to myself without telling my mum ... and when i try to tell her some problems of mine, she starts tp nag at me... and now a days i feel so down and up set ... i dunno how ... anyway take all my friends and readers of my blog ... am kinda upset now so i am going to go and chill myself.... so cya all

time comes and goes and yet so bored ~~~~

hello all ^^ i guess u all must be asking why is my title time comes and goes and yet so bored . anyway, the reason i used such a title is because i feel that time is passing by so fast ~~~ and it seems to be sipping throught bit by bit as i type this posting. but oh well time cannot be stop. everyone will have to reach 50 some day thought hehhe . so i guess i will still leave on to my moto ^^ happy also one day, sad also one day, cry also one day, so might as well be happy and smile all the way ^^. thought it is easy to say, but it ishard to do such a thing but i have try haha and well it worked ^^

anyway, afew days ago, i quarreled with my mum and now we are fine ^^ and she is like more and more concern about me ^^ thought we quarreled and din wanna speak to each other we still at the end smsed each other and chat ^^ hahaha like what people say, all mothers are the same thought they are angry with us but at the end they still love us and have a softy spot for us and we are the same too hehehe at the end will still give in to them. but anyway, my mum is my only parent left so i guess it is only right to listen to her, be with her, surpport her and spent time with her ^^ further mor, my mum now knows that i am a gay she accepted it thought she told me that she is sad cos i am a gay and she tells me to try to change and of cos i will try to change but still i tried so many time and i cant ^^ but still, i some how still prefer guys over girls, i feel that to be with a guy is better than to be with a gal cos, just somehow guys are sometimes sweeter and also will help each other more cos it is a guys natural character to be stronger and supportive ^^ and a guy who i love supporting me and me supporting a guy i love is what i really wish for ^^

anyway now i am working now, and in my offce i am the only guy in my department and they think that i am a nomal guy hehehe, and i really hope they dont ask me this, where is ur girlfriend, cos if they ask i really dunno what to say, am i going to say oh i am a gay and i only like guys or am i just going to tell another lie. but lets put it this way, if i tell people i am a gay, they will start to avoid me and pinpoint me and if i tell them a lie i have to tell many lie to cover a lie hiazz... which i really dont wanna. but it seems that i have no choice but to tell a lie and cover it with many other lies which it is going to mak it into a big fat lump of lies.but well, i guess the big fat lump of lie is better rthan to tell the truth, cos i dont wanna let my mum to be a laughting stock and also not to disgrace her. further more we are working in the same company so i guess it is best that it is kept a secret about my sexuality. but i just wonder, if one day my working colleague finds out that i am a gay, what will happen ... will my working life be worst ? or will be the same peaceful and full of laughter ? hiazz but i guess it is best that i keep it a secret even till the day i leave my company. Oh well guess it is tme for me to hit the hay. kinda late ler and also my hair is already dried so i guess i wll go sleep bah ^^ so nites all and have a good night sleep ^^ will try to update my bloggy asap ~~~ cos working so lesser time to update my blog hahha ^^ OYASUMI NAHSAI ~~~~ good night, sweet dreams and sleep tight ^^ bye bye ~~~~

ANGRY ~~~~~ ANGrier ~~~~~~~ angriest

argh !!! i am so angry with my mother ... i was told to do some eclaim on short notice, and it was like so unfair to me ... T-T just cos i dont wanna let my mummy down and also not to give trouble to her friend i rush the stupid e claim for her.... than now i am sick and my mummy nag at me T-T where is justice !!!! not fair to me ... here was what happen.

as usual every friday for people who work is a happy day, so at night my friend ask me to play mahjong and of cos i agreed, so we play mahjong on friday night till saturday morning, and on that friday night my mama jolin told me she is going to drop thee claim thingy on friday night in my letter box without even telling me that the dead line was on sunday which was the 5th september and so hearing that i quickly called my brother and ask him if he open the letter box, and he told me well if there is any letter i will put it on ur bed and i dont even have the letter box key, and wth i went home that night it was not on my bed and he was not home and so i played mahjong, that night while playing mahjong, i game a game with 13 wonders and my friends and bro was shock. after that i went to meet my mummy and her friends to go pray. and of cos it was a wonderful day till my mama jolin tells me that the e claim dead end is tomorrow ~~ i was like WTH ... and i was already not feeling very well since friday morning ... and i just kept quiet, and once my mum heard that she than gave me a copy of the letter box key !!!! i was like wth, so no choice, i had to go home and open the letter box andthan do the e claim, and when i saw the e claim i wws like WTF so many how to finish, so no choice sine the time i got home i did the claim till the next morning and than i had a short sleep and i woke up and continue doing it. without doing anything i did all the e claims and finally at SUNDAY NIGHT 10 plus i finish every thing and i pass it to mama jolin and at that moment i am like having migrains and also having a little gastric ... i went dow nto buy my dinner ate my dinner and i feel so sick ... thw whole night i could niot sleep, and this morning i called my mum my mum gave me bloody attitue i was like eth, just cos dont wanna let her be in a bad position i got attitude for her and i got sick just becos of that !! T-T so unfair to me sob sob. why must i always get into this type of idiotic situations ... so unfair to me !!! i wanna cry but cant cry ..... why she like that de ..... but i felt it was very noble of her accepting that i am a gay and also showered me with more love and attention but i dont understand what i am doign is becos of her ... oif i know she was like that than bloody hgell i am not going to rush the eclaims for her !!!!!!! it is like so unfair to me !

hmmmm ~~~ busy and tired yet cant stop what iam doing ...

hiaz, from reading my title u should know i have just start to work, so tired, everyda wake p at 7.30 am thansower leave home head to work at redhill, than 6 p leave office and go home ... so tired, but i kinda ike the job, thought what i do is to ensre that everything matches and thn relax haha, i like this kinda job, i hate those going around and move up and down ...

haha thought i like th work but it is kinda tired, but anyway back to the issue where i told y mummy that i dont like girls, she accepted it and i told my god kor kor and his gal frien , my gan mei mei and a close friend of mine and they were like i see and than that trigger me thinking have they already expected to be like this or not... thought i get some goood scolding from my kor kor haha but he still care for me ^^

oh well for now i think this is the few friends i trust the most but i wanna tell my best buddy whom i have know since primary one ^^ hope he is free soon so i can tell him about it. but oh well, a least i have friends who really accept me for who i am, this kinda friends are hard to find so i consider myself lucky to have such friends ^^

oh well guess i am tired, i am heading for my bed so good night to all and have a good public holiday ^^ muacks love u guys ^^

have choosen the path and told the truth ...

Hi all , well i guess u might have guess what i have dont from what my title of this posting have posted. Well i have told my mum that i am not straingh , thought ithought she would be extreme upset, angry with me and also upset with me she din. All she said was " my darling, try ur best and change, do it for mummy seek." I was like so upset when she said that to me, i was expecting that she would be angry and would yell at me but she din, after telling her for the next few dayds she kept smsing me asking where am i, what i was doing and also have i eaten. So most of the time i will reply her said that i am at home and i am looking for things to do, well all of it is true. But it came to the question if i have eaten i told her that i have no appitide and all she said was darling, u must eat and dont be troubled by what u have told me yesterday. I was like totally so upset and depressed that i literally wanted to breakdown. but ever since my mum know that i am not so straight and also different from my brothers, she was more patient and also gave me more attention, but because of this i am even more upset, but at least one of my greatest problem have been solve but there is more to come. Like for example how am i suppose to tell her i have boyfriends before and also what if i am attach how to tell her ? Thats the part i am kinda troubled with actually, but oh well i will have to use the policy i used to say boat till peir will automatically turn straight.

But anyway till today it have been like 5 to 6 days. My mum is still the same she will sms me and ask me where am i. But i notice the new question that recently pop out after i told her bout my sexuality orientation, and the question is "who are u with ?". But well as time passs sooner or later if i ever get attach again i have to intro my other half to my mum too and i hope she will accept it, further more now she have just accepted that i am a gay, it is already ahuge blow to her. I dont think she can handle it if i told her i have boyfriends. And what if when i tell her i haver boyfriends and she ask how many boyfriends i have before how am i suppose to tell her ? She will be fainting i guess. So for now i think the wisest choice for me now is to keep quiet and lay low and see what will happen. Hope that she will not ask such questions so that i will not have to tell her all about it. Thought i have once told her before that being gay is genectically in built in use. It has been decided that we are gay or not the day we were born. So there is no way we can decide for ourself for that and all we could do is to just act straight and not allow anyone to know we are what we are but only allowing some of our close friend know that we are and our family members know will do. Excluding brothers, sisters and grandparents. Oh well i guess that would be all the things i wanna say bah but i will try to make another posting tomorrow ^^. thanx for reading my bloggy ^^ thanx ~~~ thanx to all my reader love u guys. PLEASE to ake full use of the shout box. leave ur comment there and make some noise hahaha LOVE U GUYS ^^

times running out ... 2 options left ... do or die ...

hiaz... today have been a bad day for me. i literally am feeling kinda down and depressed. not only my family is getting from bad to worst, but i am feeling really really tired of living and carrying on with my life ... now a days i am always alone at home, and the worst part is my mum is never home, except on mondays ... and sometimes saturday we will go out together, there are some things i really do like to tell her like my sexual oreintation, but afraid that she may not be able to accept it, i strive to keep it to myself and act as the child she wanted me to be, a normal boy who would have a gal friend... and than develope it further and start a family but i cant ... cos i really have no feelings for gals, i tried to like gals but it always failed.. and i dont wanna leave any burden behind, i dont wan any other woman to be like my mum, slog hell alot just to bring up 3 useless brothers , and at the end ... elder brothers is a loner who like to bear grudges and dont talk to my mum, second one, once got married got wife ... he would never even remember he have a mum... would only remember her when she has a car to borrow ... and as for me ... unable to be like a normal man to fall in love with a gal and have a family and also not completeing my studies... every night i tried to make myself to go to bed,but no matter how hard i tried not to think of this question it will still always pops out in my mind and haunt me and the question would be "will mummy accept me for who am i ?" and after that i would think of this "what if she dont" ... i just cant keep myself from thinking all the things that will happen to her, i am so scare that she will just be so emotionall down and depressed which i really hope it will not happen, but i really cant tolerate it anymore, and i really wanna confess to her but i just dont dare to ... it is like so hard for me to hide things from her as i never like to hide things from her ... and i am so scare that if i admit and cofess to her that i am a gay, she would disown me which i dont wan ... so i really hope i can make myself to keep it as a secret and never tell it to my mum ...

hiaz... i just really dunno how, just that there is no one i can really talk to share with my problems and my close friends and best friends are all anti gays and i am like so so so upset, there is like totally no one where i can speak to about my problems ... like today ... she came home and i was so happy ... but than my friend asked me to play mahjong and i said ok, so me , my elder bro plus my both friends played mahjong till today morning and after that my friends went home and my brother went to work ... and she started to nag at me ... i like the usual will just listen and if it is some important points i will remember( but most of the time all repeated), but i was kinda sad when she started to give me attitude, i was feeling so upset and thought i know i am a really useless person who dont even know A to Z when i was in K2 and would only know how to count 1 to 10 while the others already knew 1 to 100 ...and now, i am like so useless, everything is like cant do can do, not only i am changing my poly (meaning not completed studies) but also my health is starting to fail me... i know i am really useless but i just really cant help to think of my mum all the time ... i always think of her so frequent and would sms her soethings in the middle of the night,and she would reply me in the morning ... i really love her so much and i dont bear to hide things from her but i really cant imagine the impacto n her if i ever tell her i have a preference for guys, i just really cant imagine...and all i can do now is just saying sorry to her on this blog, while knowing her that she is bad with computer and dunno anything bout blog...

i am really sorry mummy that i am a useless and also good for nothing.. but pls forgive me that i am not a normal guy who will go and like a gal thought i am a bisexual but still i prefer guys far more than gals... i am really sorry mummy i really hope u will accept me for who i am ... LOVE U MUMMY ......

Ur Unfaithful Son

Hmmmmmm~~~ does old flames really do burn again ~~~

hi all it has been sometime before i have up dated my bloggy, oh well today my ex who was my first first bf pm me on a msn, thought last time we were once together, the feeling i have for him and my recent bf was really different, the reason he gave and have left me was because he wanted to cocentrade on his studies and i accepted it but it was kinda painful...

as time pass by, thought we were separated i still have feelings for him , just now when i was chatting to him, he kinda hinted that he wants a patch, and i really dont mind patching back together with him cos i really like him, thought his year is his o levels but still i really liked him alot, and he is the only bf that i have been attach to for the longest, and i really like him alot, but anyway today he wants to meet me up and maybe if things goes well we may be back together again and if i were get back together with him i would be happy hahaha, but still he was afraid to ask me directly cos he was afraid that i may not accept him again, but the fact was that i was waiting for him to ask me to go back to him, cos when i am with him the feeling was so different, everything i felt was kinda perfect. but welll we can say but stillto matter what after a wound recovers there will be still scars left at where the wound is. but oh well, to my feeling the chances for us= to patch back is kinda high but still there is still a low chance where there will be a no ... so we shall see how things goes.

oh well, time have passed so fast and i cant believe it is going to be christmas soon, i have broke up with my bf bout 3 weeks and it seeks to be just yesterday, and u know something i just found out that my the last last bf, he was seeing someone behind my back while he was with me, and all along my guard feeling was correct, oh well, i knew as much when i know him the first time, he always tells me he is busy and so on but where he is after his work ? bugis playing game... what i do i kept quiet, week ends call him to accompany me, what he told mee ? he told me he was busy but after that i found out he is drinking at tanjong pagar at a aj pub i also kept quiet, and whats the best part ? promised to call me everytime also din call i still remain silence, told him to sms me in the mornign when he is up ? did if for the first 2 weeks than after that he din and when i called him and said wah never sms me he said i know u will call me so i din sms, i was like ok but i already saw the end of the relationship was drawing near... oh well, i dont wanna say who is he but u know who i am saying ... cos i have spoken to afew of ur ex and they said the same thing, but anyway let me tell u this, don enter a relationship and start to tell people that u wan him to be loyal to u and also truthful to u while behind his back keep meeting others and also telling lies... and u keep saying u have no money and u kept changeing phone isnt it ironic ? but i mean it is up to u if u wanna do such a thing but u tc , dont forget , aj circle is small and so u dont think u can do things that u like with out letting ur other half know thats is if u are attach now ok ? u should know i am talking bout u bah , the one who stays at jurong west...

oh well i am happy that i am no longer with him hahahaha , anyway thanx for reading my bloggy ^^ thans u guys muacks ~~~ hope u all will visit again hehehe anywya i will post a joke maybe later today so i hope u guys will like it MUACKS and thanx for visiting my bloggy ^^ love u alll and i love u most mummy

funny email but true~~~~~~

one of my classmates send me this email and i kinda reallyl ike it and i gave a few friedns to read it hahaha... welll thought is is funny but it is kinda true~~~

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, he said...no. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever....and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he replied with a no.
She had heard enough.
As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said....
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I dont want to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldnt cry if you walked away...I'd die...

Send this to everyone on your list.......isn't that sweet? I like you because of who you are to me. You are a true friend, if I don't get this back I'll take a hint.

haha it is really really true ~~~ and i also look at my bf's quality but not the appearance ^^ muacks love u my dear ~~~ hahaha there was another email which was kinda funny, but the pic is kinda off cos so i dont think i will post it, but is it bout sponge bob in india, but the pic is actually a india man wrap in a sponge, but the problem is that i dunno if that mean is alife and just lie in it or is it a picture of a dead man but they use a sponge to wrap him .... so ya better dont post it ^^ oh well maybe tonight i will post something again hehehe so yupz have a nice day ahead~~~

and before i end this, here a little question to twitch ur mind ~~~ hahahaha

what word will still pronouse the same and sound the same even if u read it up side down and right to left ?

hehehe Clues ~~~
Clue number 1 : It is a 5 letter word
Clue number 2 : S _ _ _ S
Clue number 3 : DONT EVER PLAY MAHJONG IF U DUNNO THIS WORD ^^

hehe leave ur answer at the shout box ~~~

bored, more bored, very bored and extreme bored ?

hi all~

how are u guys going along haha oh well it has been a long time before i thought of anything to write ~ haha oh well, this few days have been a happening day for me hahaha firstly i have fell in love with someone hehehe last time when i first time meet him i thought he will not contact me after that and i though he din like me and some how i manage to ask him and i told him i scare he din like me and he told me that he was scare i din like him also hahaha but oh well hehe since now i know he and me feels the same, i proposed to him that lets try dating each other see how haha initially he was scare that he hurt me but after some chatting he finally decided to do what i said hehe but not to worries sweets lets try ok ? hehe muacks

after saying bout my sweets, now i wanna talk bout my poor da ger, lol trying to sell a 3 room flat but kenna alot of funny buyers ... din know some singaporeans are really prankster, haha why did i say this cos some of them dont intend to buy house but call to make appointment to view flat, hahaha others ? wanna buy the flat but not eligible... y ? cos they sold a same size flat before hahaha bad ya ? anyway i hope my da ger will sell the flat that he put in so much effort for ^^ jy jy ok da ger ? wish u all the best~~~~ and if any of u need a agent to sell ur flat or rent a room come find me i give u my da ger de number and he will help u ^^ he is a nice guy so dont worry hahaha ^^

hiaz so sian, i am like so bloody bored T-T, wanna sleep but cant sleep cos of my stupid flu medication and my migrain head aches, it is like making me feeling so unconfortable, hiaz, but anyway i am trying to look for things to do haha. Oh My Gosh, look at the time !!!!!!! 5.06 am ler eeks i better hit the sack otherwise cant wake up early hahaha so Good Night everyone ^^ tc and sleeep tight ~~~~ sweet dreams ~~~~ I love u sweets and i love u too my mummy ~~~ and definitely not my a ger~~~ goooooood luck on selling ur 3 room flat and hit ur target at the end of the year ~~~~ good nights all ~~~~

judge ?? since when i judge u ?? ATTN> darrick and ZJ

oh u say i judge u on my own perception ? since when ? i din judge u ... u are doing a very direct hinting ... i din say anything ... but if u say that i am judging u than i have really nothing to say. no matter what i still gave u face and din say anything much but if u say like that u give me face ? my goodness i give u face and u wanna be this offensive fine with me. i ask u a very simple thing lor. when u were single u will always ask me out for coffee than when u are attach u dump me at a corner fine i am cool with it, but u remember this ok it is not the first time ler. u are now painting a very clear picture to me, saying that on when i am single i have "bro" with me, and when i am attach i can chark him one corner and tell him this " give me mor time to adept" fine with it i shall give u all the time u need but i can tell u one thing, u can ask for another tomorrow and i shall give u another tomorrow but dont forget u are just misusing peoples trust, i treat u as a real bro, u ask urself, even when i am attach i still meet u and also my dear, and when infront of my dear i got say dont anyhow talk la, control ur language la, did i ? u go and read the sms u send to me, ok fine i understand u din mean it but pls u know how hurting is it ? well u say ur bf is the educated type dislike valgarity, than i not educated la ? u mean i am a low life person la ? i am cool with it. darrick i tell u ok, first time when u and hafiz together i din say anything and when u broke off and than meet me for coffeee and hang out i din say anything much i close one eye and open one eye. but one have a limit of tolerating ok bear that in mind. for now i dont wanna say anything much. but u think lor ok have a boyfriend than abandon a bro is it the right thing ? i dont wanna say anything u just think ... thats all i wanna say

and for u ZJ, i also dont wanna say much lor, u treat me as a friend ok, but u think what ? u like u talk to me u attach u dump me a side too ? wah in this world got this type of bro ? my goodness i dunno what happen to u 2. last time, when the both of u say " when i get attach i will remember u de so dont worry." but see ? once attach both gone than once no bf come back find me ... nvm lor ... i am ok with it ... ask me for more time to adept ? ok i give u lor but how long ? like someone say till u turn back single huh ? ok lor i shall see lor

anyway u both tc, i dont wanna say much, from that time i last hang out to u all i already told myself prepare for the worst, this 2 person say only but at the end of the day it will not happen. thought there may still be miricles so i shall wait for that day to come... cheers to u 2 and hope u both lead a happy life ^^ love my mum and my friends and all of those who read my blog~~~ Once Bitten Twice Shy.....

time time time~~~~ whats more u need ?

tsk tsk tsk~~~ bro lets put it this way ... not only i feel it this way la hor, even if i give u all the time u wan i can sure tell u, it will still be the same ... a leapord never changes its spots ... if u dont believe why dont u ask someone who know us tooo ~~~ oh well u take care bah hope ur family things will settle ... u take care ... no use to spam my shout box after reading my bloggy de ... read and u put ur pillow high high and think what i said is it true or not ~~~so take care

LOve my mummy~~~~~ hehehe muacks ~~~~ and all my friends and reader of my bloggy~~~

Once Bitten Twice Shy~~~~~

time have pass~~~ and like what i said once forgotten forever forgotten~~~

oh well it have been some time ever since the diva got attach ~~ as predicted he will not cotact me and i dont bother to contact him too so as usual i stayed at home stick o my msn and chat with my friends hahaha and also meet at mad fellow for coffee and crap with him hehehe

oh well time have really pass ... it has been almost 2 weeks my bro got attach and he din even bother so sms me like last time hahaha oh well ... already predicted it will happen so let it be lul hahaha ... so for the pass 2 weeks i have been gaming, hehe i played cabal and i find the game quite interesting hehe as u see the pros bully the not so pros hahaha and end up the not so pros will be using the trade chat to scold about haha and we the nobodies or the bo chups will just keep quiet and continue to play and laught silently hahaha ...

anyway now to think back at the times when me and my bro hang out together almost everyday. it is kinda fun and full of laughter, now once he starts to get attach he can just abandone me and our other bro one side and dont contact us ... see la how heartless of him ... anyway i wish him all the best on his current relationship and take care ... i just really hope he treats me as a real bro and not when he is single, he come mingle with me and when he is attach he dumps me aside. i believe in what he told me when the last time i talk to him "give me some time to adjust , i still love my bro and i will not ps u de..." but as time pass, his actions speaks more than his words and i start to feel otherwise ... anyway bro u take care bah ... whether or not u treat me as one it is up to u bah ... if ur conscience are clear to say than i have nothing to say~~~ bro wish u and mark to be together forever and wish u both all the best ~~~ hope u both will remain happy and lovely together ~~~ guess this is what i can say~~~ i hope the time where i have to bide farewell to our friendship or brothership will never come ... but i sense it is appraoching soon ...

Love all my friends and buddy ^^ love u all especially u mummy and dear~~~ and i like to say this too once bitten twice shy to my bro~~~

the lonely silly T-T

oh well time pass really fast haha ... last time the sill always hang out with the diva ... but now the diva have got himself attach haha good for him anyway and now he ps the silly so sad haha but anyway i am use to it ler hahaha

last time when he was last attach also like that suddenly disappear haha so i am kinda use to it haha the day he everyday call me it means it is up to no good ler ^^ anyway am kinda happy for him cause he manage to find his mr right and for me i just became single again haha ^^ anyway i was kinda happy to be with u thought it was just a short period of time ^^ hope u find a new and better bf than hehe ^^


anyway once a relationshi turn sour it will remain to be sour no mastter how much sugar u add to it and am kinda happy we had a clean break~~~ oh well today wa kinda of a bad days so am really tired so i guess am going to bed early ~~ nites all love all my friends and my only mummy ^^ love u all ~~~

wowee~~~ National day~~~~ *BORED*

oh well today is the birthday of singapore hahaha anyway HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE~~~ thanx for accomadating me thought hahaha for the pass 21 years~~~ oh well today was kinda of a boring day for me. i was kinda bored and i thought might as well come and see how3s my bloggy din expect that my blog would be view over a thousand times hehehe thanx alot ya my friends~~~ anyway ... i just turn single again haha thought it was painless but still sometimes think of it hahaha oh well if u guess were to wonder why i say it was kindap ainless cos i have experienced more painful things than breaking up so ya am kinda use to the hard times. even thought i am kinda soft hearted type of person i seldom shed tears anymore cos of what happen my hearts kinda solified now ...

anyway talking bout my posting ... i was kinda shock cos i have been monitoring for the past few days. before i posted my last posting it was only 668 reader but i din expect it to jump so fast i till it hit 1078 hahaha but anyway thanx for reading my blog ^^ i all along try to keep a low profile of myself but somehow my friends told me i am not a low profile as i think i am =( so i hope and pray what they say is not true sobby !

anyway ... timehave pass kinda fast soon it i going to be the end of the year ler hahaha and soon it is going to be 2009~~~ my goodness time do fly. today we celebrate the 43th birthday of singapore and i hope that the parade is more colourful and interesting hahahah but well everyyears about the same i justhope everyyear the front part of the parade would be cut off hahaha but oh well just let it be la huh like what some of u would say hahah the commands yelled out by the commander are kinda funny lol. suddenly got caw lan ( dogs balls?) to arh (duck) to punchi punchi hahaha i was like giggling all the way and there was this part where i laughted even more suppose to march off so when marching pass all have to look at the president but who knows this fellow was looking in the sky hahaha !!

anyway guess that would be all for today hehehe will write something later again hehehe and thanx for reading my blog again ^^ love u all my friends and readers ~~~~ ^^

the sillty, the diva , the humble boy and a arrogant ass

hi guy , i guess u were wondering why i name my this current posting this title .. well i wa kinda pissed off with what happen on friday... u see in the aj circle or even logic wise ... there are some ground rule we have to follow but some how this pair of newly attach couple just did something and i was really pissed off ... thought the humble boy is my friend and is kinda new to the aj circle din know anything so it is ok but his bf well kinda know but still did it ... so this was what happen ...

On friday night i recieve a called from my dear friend boi boi ... he called me and ask me whether can he come to my house so i said not sure ... cos i am not sure if my mum will be home ... and also wondering how he was doing... so i ask him to ask my bro whether if can stay over at his place ... so before asking him to ask my bro(the diva) i actually ask him if u were coming alone and he say no he was bringing a friend ... so when he said a friend is coming along the first question that pop out of my mind immidiately was is he aj or a straight ... this was what he reply ..." i dunno u ask him" so i say ok ... so i ask whats his name ... my friend said his name is JOHN so i said ok ... so since he said he dunno he is a aj or not i told him say ok so my next question was u come my house do what ? he say cabal so i said Oi dont hor later u dump him there than i entertain again is it ?(happen once when he brought someone to my house with out my permission and lucky i know that person) so i say no we play card together ok ? he said ok so i say i get back to u later and ask him to ask my bro ... soon my bro say his place cannot... so after finding out that my mum was not coming home i said ok u can come over to my place lor ... and so ok they made thier way to my place ... soon they arrive i was about to shower so i call my bro to meet them and come my place ... and to my horror ... my bro told me thats not his friend ... that so call JOHN was his BOYFRIEND i was like WTH ... if i knew it was his bf i sure would not have allowed them to come ( at that moment i was alredy very pissed off cos he din tell me it is his bf and also boi boi say he is going to be straight after breaking up with TONY another aj)... so since they are here and there was no more train i let them come and i met them around my block ... and to my horror~~ the person who was claim to be JOHN was actually on my msn and he is a aj ! i kept looking at him and soon i manage to confirm he is SHAWN LEE who stays at JURONG WEST and so i ask again "whats his name ? " and u know what la boi boi ( not revealing his name) told me he is JOHN so ok i accepted that lie and kept quiet ... hinting again and again not to lie to me he refuse to listen and so it is ok ... when at my room i hinted them pls ok u can hug and kiss but no sex ... cos my brother(real life brother) would come into my room and use the toilet and so on sometimes and i told them no sex even my bro help me hinted them ... i mean pls la ok u are at someone house and it is not nice to have sex in others house and on others bed right? and u guess what they did ? they had sex in my bed i front of me and my bro ! i was like hinting them pls no sex and there they weill sucking each others tongue ? i mean WTF ! what if my bro comes in and so me and my bro gave a sarcastic stare to make them shy hoping they would stop and who know they continued ! i was pissed off by boi boi for telling me that SHAWN LEE was actually JOHN TAN ... i was like already so pissed and now have SEX ON MY BLOODY BED i was already so turn off by it ... i was like WTF what if my brother comes in ... and to my horror they were kissing and they were on top of each other ... (my door is lock most of the time and cos sometimes my brother(real life brother) comes into my room to use the toilet so he has the key) ... suddenly my bro(real life brother) wanted to use the toilet so he actually unlock my door and just dash in and that SHAWN just literally jump off boi boi ... i was like HOPING my bro(real life borther) din see it cos after opening my door he would actually put the key back into his room i was like WTF if my bro(real life brother) see and he told my mum ... i would be skined alife ... so amounting to all this they just stayed to kissing and hugging and soon they hug each other under my blanket ... before they covered ... they were in shirt after the blanket covered them from head to toe me and my bro could hear smooching and moaning ... i was like WTF ! soon they uncovered thier head ... they were both topless ...i was like so bloody pissed at that moment i just kept quiet and after wearing thier clothes back they continue !! and worst they could smooch till they were lieing on my bro's body !!! and i hinted them again by taking a packet of tipbits and sit there and munch on my tipbits hoping to really pissed them off and make them stop but they din ...finally when they say they go for smoking break in my toilet my bro went in too and they kissed in my toilet too !!! ... i was so pissed off at that moment i literally wanted to leave my room and go down stairs with out even telling my bro ... but i din wan to as it would be disrespect to my bro and so i just controlled and keep quieted and hoping it would faster reach 6 am ... soon it was 5am bro needed to go home so i said bro i pei u ... we went to the coffeeshop ... my bro knowing that i am extremely pissed he actually comfort me and he was also really pissed off ... i was like screaming and yelling WTF ... it is not right to have sex at others house ... WHAT TREAT ME HOUSE AS A HOTEL 81 OR PROTITUTION HOUSE ? FUCK ! i was like so bloody pissed off ... so i said nvm ... i told my bro later i am going to tell both of them off ... first telling me a lie that THAT ACT TO BE JOHN TAN SUPPOSINGLY to be another person and NOT A AJ ! SUPPOSEINGLY TO PLAY CARD BUT ENDING UP HAVING SEX IN MY ROOM ON MY BED ? ... so soon ... it was 6 am i met my bro and in front of him i told the both of them off ... JOHN TAN DONT THINK THAT I DUNNO U ARE SHAWN LEE OF JURONG WEST OK ? both were completely stunn and i was really pissed and fuming mad ... and i could see my friend boi boi was abit stunn and so i just walk and they follow me behind ... my bro just kept quiet ... and at the coffeeshop i kept my cool and keep quiet sip my coffee ... and i told them again and again never like to me ... i was so bloody pissed off hao ma and worst that stupid SHAWN LEE give me a look as if he was so bloody smart and he kept saying from the beginning i know u know who am i and so on ler i was so bloody pissed ... soon after i send them to the mrt ... and before boi boi left he wanted to give my bro and me a hug ... i was so pissed and i actually turn and left before he could hug my and he hug my bro ( sorry boi boi i know i was kinda rude but i was angry till the brim) ... he knowing that i was rather pissed off i just walk off ... soon my and my bro went to a coffeeshop and sit and i smsed boi boi ... this ... " i treat u as a friend and you treat me as a fool. i give you my trust and uplayed with it so dont expect me or darick to trust you in future tc and see a doc ( cos he was abit not feeling well)" and soon i got his sms replied "nvm le moo moo. u take care too. think today is my last daycan see u 2 liao. Nvm de la . i happy i gt memories wib u 2 . nvm nvm de . i dun blame u 2 . its boi boi fault . :( u take beri good care of urself le and derick . bubbyes " i was like so bloody pissed off cos when we were conversing at the coffeeshop his bf SHAWN LEE is so bloody arroagant ... so i told them am not going let this matter go so easily mean i will not forget it so easily and guess what HIS BF SHAWN LEE replied me this bloody sms and i blew my top this is what he smsed me "anyway shanw here ah.. u dun have to do anything de .. :) cause all along i dun intend to tell anyone i dun really noe le the fine with it la.. it doesn't harm me in anyway .. further more i duneven know u veri well so noe so much about me for ? onli now than i know abit bout u la.. :) " see how arrogant he is ? know he is in the wrong and still do this and all his sms from than on is like implying he is very high and almighty ?

SINCE MR SHAWN LEE U JUST KNOW ME ABIT RIGHT I WILL LET U KNOW MORE ABOUT ME ... I AM THE EASY GOING TYPE BUT IF U EVER LIE TO ME I WILL GIVE U CHACE TO REPENT BY HINTING U AGAIN AND AGAIN TO TELL ME THE TRUTH BUT GIVING U SO MANY HOURS TO TELL ME THE TRUTH U REFUSE I WILL LET U KNOW I KNOW THE TRUTH AND IF U TELL ME SORRY NICELY I WILL LET IT GO BUT NOW IT IS TOO LATE EVEN IF U SAY SORRY ... I KNOW SLIGHTLY MORE BOUT U OK SHAWN

NAME : SHAWN LEE
PROFILE NUMBER : 73830181
MSN : shawnylee@hotmail.com
ADDRESS : JURONG WEST BLOCK 4XX UNIT NUMBER 1X-9X
HP NUMBER : 9001 XXXX

AND SHAWN, YES BOI BOI DUNNO ANYTHING BUT I THINK U ARE EXPERIENCE ENOUGHT TO TELL HIM THAT IT IS NOT RIGHT TO HAVE SEX IN OTHERS HOUSE RIGHT ? SO DONT TELL ME HE DUNNO OK ? IT TAKES 2 HAND TO CLAP

dear reader after reading pls do tell me am i in the wrong or are they in the wrong ? sorry bout it but i am really so pissed off bout it there for i really wanna vent my anger ... anyway thanx for reading my blog pls do comment ^^ love u all muacks ^^love my dear and my mum ^^

hahaha sorry ~~~ was busy to post~~~~

hi all ... sorry i was kinda busy so i din update my bloggy hahaha ... anyway for the last 2 weeks i was feeling kinda down cos my cat died ... and the day before i got my cats ashes ... wow my cat so big and now she fit into a small little urn ... hiaz i miss her alot ... he naughtiness and also her cuteness ... i really wanna cuddle her to sleep sob sob ... but anyway at least she died with out suffering ... my poor little darling died and i felt so down and up ... haiz ....

oh well anyway for the past one week nothing interesting happen ... hahaha but today ... is the first day of hungry ghost festival ~~~ and soon it is going to be national day lol ... than there will be the stupid national day parade which will be filled with stupid thingy and it is going to take up the tv time slot ... oh well but it is nice hahaha but i pity those who are active in it cos they have to take the sun and the stress hahaha jia you ok u guys performing ^^ and after the celebration ... there will be the talk again by the pm ... u know who la he will talk alot of non sensible thingy sian and waste the time slot for better shows ... but anyway happy birthday singapore and thanx for nothing ya ^^ hahaha oh well that would be all for now hehe since now i am in a better mood i am going to update my bloggy more frequent hahaha ...

LOve my mummy and my dear ^^ and all my dear friends~~~~~ hehehe ^^

just lost a little love one ...

T-T todays is another painful day for me ... my cat who have been living with me for 15 year have just pass on ... my grandma , mum , bro , sis , and me are feeling very upset ... i am like totally feeling so upset ... earlier on i cubbled her as she breathes her last few breath before passing on ... before she passo n she vomited and look at me for the last time before she was gone from the waorld and gone to the far plane to meet my father and grand fathers ... i will really really miss her alot ... i will sure miss her gentle coat of fur and adorable face ... i feel so so so upset ... i cant believe she just pass on ... hoping she would live longer so she could have a more joyious life when time to come ... but who knows her life end today 22th July 2008 ... at 12. 15 pm 09 secs ... i could see that my grandma was really hoping she was alife cos when i went to answer a phone call ... she actually go and touch her and called out her names hoping she would meow for her the last time ... but my cat din ... as i see my grandma walking towards the kitchen will a sarrowful face ... i was kinda upset too but having to control myself from not crying afraid that she would cry too i held on and dare not cry afraid she would also cry ... i really cannot believe that my healthy little fat cat would die so soon ... i witness her last moments of living ... as she struggles to draw every of her single breath ... and soon she started to stiffen up and vomited and just stop breathing ... and it was the last time she drew her breath and look me in the eyes ... i am like why must she die so early ... why i just cant believe it ... hiaz .... guess today is a bad day for me ... hiazz ... now i am totally out of mood for everything ... from eating to sleeping to watch tv ... i feel totally very very down ... but thanx to my baba who tried to comfort me and cheer me up thanx ... love u mummy and dear ... and all my friends ... and thanx to the staffs of Paradise Pet Shop located at 232 Whitley Rd Mt Pleasant Animal Hospital Singapore 297824 for sponsoring the other half of my cats cremation when we are having some financial difficulties and also alice who was kind enought to console me even thought i am just someone over the phone who is feeling really down thanx alot alice ... thanx alot for the sponsorship ... and if i were much more well to do i will sure repay for u good deeds ... thanx a million ... when i am free i will sure take a trip down to thank the people there and also buy alice lunch ... thanx ...

Something iread and i think that i should share...

today i was kinda having runny nose so i cant sleep so i started to surf the net and i came across this article ... of Lawrence King a young boy aged 15 who was bold enought to admit that he is a homosexual and soon he was bullied , teased , pinpointed , being outcast and at the end was shot to death ... oh well the article is kinda long but after reading it ... i kinda pity him ... the article's which appeared on NewWeek titled "Young, Gay and Murdered" ... if u are curious bout the storey heres the link >>> http://www.newsweek.com/id/147790/page/1 (hope the article will never be removed)

oh well after reading the really really long article ... ther were alot of interesting facts that were stated in the article like ... "One study found that the average age when kids self-identify as gay has tumbled to 13.4" haha i found it quite true hahaha but any way ... i believe all of us wanna be like lawrence who dareingly tell people that "i am a gay" but cos we are in a homophobic society majority of us would rather keep it a secret amoung our group unless people finds out bout it ... but at least we are asured that what happen to lawrance will not happen to us ... but still having the entire society looking down at us once they know we are a homosexual it is kinda hard ... i cant imagine how lawrence felt when the entire schools even teacher who are suppose to help us students even outcast lawrence and also treated him in a bias way ... hiaz .... i wonder what would have happen to me if i were to be in lawrence shoes ... but lets hope that lawrence wil be give justice ...

oh well enought bout that and moving over to myself haha ... today was a rainy day and as u know when someone have flu they will hate the rainy weathers .... cos it will be cold and also when u go out ur feets will be wet and when u go to a shopping center with wet feet u will feel that u are walking on ice hahaha ... but anyway today i GOT MY CONTACT LENS hahaha ... i tried it on and wow !!! i could see things more clearly hehehe but sad to say first time i wear i can only wear for 4 hours but who knows i manage to wear only for 2 hours cos it kept moving and moving and i adjusted it back so frequently that it felt painful so i took it out haha ... oh well anyway later i will try putting it on again hehee and this time round i hope it will not be painful ... hehehe cos today i have to go to the bank to settle my school loan stuffs hahaha ... oh well ... i actually am very scare of something but i have to go for it this coming friday unless i am sick again and i see a dictor .. and guess what is it ? ... ns check up ... everything is fine but i am afraid of the blood test part cos i am afraid of needles T-T and also i will faint if i see blood being drawn from me sob sob ... so hopefulyl i am still having flu so i need not to go otherwise i would cry or end up in hospital if i faint ... but on well ... i have decided to reenroll myself in the poly again after withdrawing from my ex poly ... i am hoping for a near poly to my house hehehe ^^ anyway i am hoping to complete my studies before going into ns ...

after talking bout my fear ... i felt more nervous cos the last time when i took blood test in school i kinda almost faint if not for my friends who supported me i would have fainted ... but is there really a need for a blood test ? i am just wondering ... and why must we be force to go ns ? cant it be a option for us ? why must it be compulsary for guys to go ns ? how bout girls ? is it cos we guys have a dick and girls have pussy thats why we have to go ns ? or just cos they make babies to add on to the population of the nation thats is thier national service ? O.O i just wonder ... why cant we guys opp to go for ns or not to go for ns ... i just cant understand ... and furthermore i think ns is a waste of our time and youth ... why cant we decide weather to enlist ourself or to go work ? and i am just wondering ... i only have a mother left ... and my 2 brothers are like CANNOT MAKE IT and if i go ns ... who will look after my mum ? she will be totally alone right ? and further more the standart of living in singapore is like shooting higher and higher and my mum is drawing a salary which she may not be able to eat sometimes and hello ?!?!?!? she is 54 this year and i wanna spent more time with her ... she look after me since young why cant i stay with her ... look after her ... accompany her ? why ? and why should i be force to go for ns ? why ? i think even after alot of people go enquire bout the ns thingy the government just keep quiet and never say anything and from time to time they keep having those national servise advertisement and so on why ? for what waste money since u ALREADY pridicted for us to go in ler so why bother telling us the meaning and so on ? we have to repay the nation ?!?!?! my goodness i think the person we have to repay is our parents hao ma ... i just wonder those 2 guys who died in national service ... why must they day ? and what if they are the only son ? judt think how thier parents felt ? i dont wanna let my mum be sad again after losing her other half u know ... i dont wanna be dead and cant look after her ... and seriously one day i will try a wayy to tell her that i am a bisexual and i will intro her to my bf if i have one that is ... and we stay together as a family ... hiaz ...

I REALLY HOPE THE NS THINGY WOULD BE MADE OPTIONAL ... just cos our population is small it dont mean that we have to be forced to do something that we dont like to do ... it is like totally unfair for us guys ... hiazz but anyway i totally feel very upset bout it and i just wanna end my life ... why people from other country can have a colourful life from the day they were born till the day they die and why we singaporeans cant have that ? it is like standardise for us guys ... after study ns ... ns ... ns ... i rather spend the 2 years working studing and looking after my mum instead of going to ns ... IT IS A TOTAL WASTE PF TIME ! it is like totally unfair ... =(

OH WELL MY DAY HAVE BEEN RUIN ... guess i will go to bed and hope when i wake up i feel better and my runny nose is gone ... leave ur comments if u have any ... LOVE MY MUMMY ANDMY DEAR and also all my friend~~~~ OYASUMI NAHSAI ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ T3T

Down with flu~~~ and bad weather~~~

hi to all reader of my bloggy hahaha today i am having flu and i din wanna update my bloggy but since i cant sleep so might as well update it ... as i am typing my lastest posting ... i am wipeing my nose cos it is leaking ... hiaz ... i hate it when i have flu ... feel so sleepy and yet cant sleep ...

anyway ... when it was friday ... i thought it would be a long and nice weekend ... but who knows ... it pasted so fast ... oh well from friday till sunday ... all i did was wake up watch tv meet my bro nad go and stroll the pasa malum haha and when i thought that the pasa malum was ending there will be going to be another chain of stall hich is going to open under my block i am like OMG hahaha the pasa malum opposite the mrt station is ending on the 26 July which is next week hahaha ... oh well everyday i am only craving for the TAKOYAKI !!! hahaha i like it the most and it is like yummy yummy hahaha ... i have been like eating takoyaki for the pass 2 weeks hahah but i still like it alot ... hehehe and guess what i really hope there will be takoyakii when the pasa malum near my blocks open ^^

anyway ... one of my friend just got attach so oh well Congratulations to u for getting attach and i hope u and ur dear will be a happy couple hehehe ... now back to myself ... my bro and my dear told me to try contact lens and i am like OMG i dont dare haha but guess what ... i went for a eye check and my contact lens have arrive today ... hahaha so wish me good luck later when i go try it on haha i hope it is not painful when i put it on ... moooooo ... and after contact lens ... it will be a hair cut for me hahaha (BABA WHEN U GOING TO BRING ME GO CUT HAIR LIKE U PROMISE DE) kekeke oh well ... i dunno what will happen to my hair but i really hope that my hair would turn out to be scary to me hahaha .... i kinda like my curreny hair style but i think it need trimming if not my eyes will get infections and also my face will have alot of volcanic eruption *u know what i mean* haha ... oh well i am will to try all this since my baba wanted me to so oh well BABA FOR UR SEEK ... i will try ok hahaha but pls dont call me wear bright colour t-shirt and BRIGHT COLOUR SKINNYs i will die in front of u if u call me wear those hahaha ... hiaz ... my runny nose is kinda bad ... just sunday only and i have use almost 1 roll or toilet paper ... hiazz how bad is it going to be ... oh well it is going to rain so i guess i wanna go sleep ler hehe kinda cold even thought i on the fan and din on the air con ... and my mum is not home so i will just stick to the fan and the thick thick blanket hehehe ... thanx to all who have read my blog though it is less than a month old but it have been visited 500 times and counting ^^ MUACKS hehehe ... OH WELL ... GOOD NIGHT ALL ^W^ LOVE MY DEAR AND MY MUMMY MUACKS~~~~

the silly meeets the sexy again >.<

hahaha today was a long day lol ^^ it was kinda of a boring day haha and guess what a close pal of mine met me and we have a drink together and strolled the gombak area hehehe thought there was a pasa malum( dunno how to spell) ... so we walk the gpmbak area and soon i had to send him to the mrt cos he had many projects and report to do ... so sad hope could be with him longer so can chat with him more hahaha ...

but anyway meeting him was a happy thing but now coms to my bro darrick but some how he was troubled haizz ... it seems that someone he trusted alot had told him many many lies hahaha so oh well i cant blame him for being so troubled but at least he trust me alot and tell me his problems hahah oh well i actually do tell him my troubles too hahaha kinda fun when both of us together we can crap and could even say all sorts of things together hahaha anyway hehehe talking bout this i was so happy last night hehehe ^^ i manage to see my dear again hehe i met him together with darrick and my other bro ZJ hahaha (short form hehehe wanna know his true name ? ask him urself i call him jie jie) hahaha anyway my dear brought me for dinner and after that we all strolled the pasa malum and he bought many many food for me to eat and he bought durian hahaha but i wanted to bite my dear cos he actually eyed on other guys roar hahaha but anyway hehe i forgive him ler hehe but i enjoyed alot last night as my bros and my dear plus me gather and linger together hahaha

OH well anyway later my bro will be having his test ~~~ so gooood luck hahaha cannot fail argh cos u say very easy but at least 95 % pass other wise i skin u hahaha ^^

YAY anyway i was kinda suprise my bloggy have hit 400 reader hehe thanx alot ^^ I hope that some of my posting actually are similar to what u are in now and so u at least know that i am having the same problem as u hehehe well when u online u can chat to me about it too haha will be delighted tooo ^^ so cheers~~

anyway i heard this song from a friends friendster and so i added on my bloggy i find it kinda nice so i hope you readers would enjoy the songs ^^

guess thats all for tonight so good night to all and sweet dreams ^^ *yawns ~~~* time for me to shower relax abit and go to bed hahaha so CHEERS ~*thought i am no drinker* hehehe love all my friends ^^ especially my dear and MUM ~

Bisexual ??? or just Pure Gay ??? i wonder which am i ?

hahaha oh well by the look of the title of this posting u should have guess what i am thinking hahaha but anyway today i made a new friend and he is kinda confused i guess hahaha hi to my dear friend hehehe *dont worry i will keep u in my mind and not tell others who are you*

anyway i was thinking of the same thing and i met him tooo and we chat bout the same thing and so ya i thought might as well post it on my bloggy and see if how many of u agrees with my definition of bisexual and gay ?

Bisexual > have a like for the opposite sex and also the same sex ...

*LOL ... i feel that the bisexual definition is kinda ironic though hahaha ... whats the different between a half gay and a full fledge gay =x*

Pure Gay > like only thier own sex in another word homosexual ?

LOL ... any way i hope people who read this posting will help me on weather my definition is correct hahaha ....

anyway my new friend ^^ whose name start with a letter "v" ... i know u are confuse with weather u are a gay or a bi or a straight who is curious ... but not to worry ... as time past u will really know what u prefer to be and attach to who as in to a male or a female hehehe ... oh well ... if u are wondering how i found out that i am a gay hehehe ... heres my personal experience ...

When i was in primary school ... i tend to look at guys ... and i dislike gals ... and so most of the time i would be a loner and always minding my own bussiness , looking at cute guys around my age or even my senior hehehe ... but cos alot of my classmates hated gays so i din dare to tell people that i like guys and also at that point in time i was still young and so i alway think that i am just envy guys with good looks ... but still sometimes i would be attraqcted to cute looking gals ...

When i was in secondary school ... i am still the same ... looking around at guys and so on but this time round ... i started to fantasize on hugging on this particular guy in my class cos h is like so handsome and fit hehe and i am like always seeking a chance to peek at him naked ... but also there is always one fact that is around .. and this fact is that my classmates hates gays too ... and peeping at guys would be a very very gayish thingy and also let my classmate feel that i am a gay ... and still the same ... i dont believe that i am a gay ... and i continue to tell myself that i am not a gay and i still like gals ... but somehow when in secondary school i hated gals alot cos of the way they act and do thing cum the fact that they always like to whine and bitch around hehehe...
but also i know the fact that when u let people know u are a gay ... tyhey will start to boycot u and also start pinpointing u ... giving u nick names ...

When i am in poly ... i am still the same ... the quiet guy ... who like to be quiet and do my things and help my friends when they are in trouble ... for the first few weeks of the semester of my first year i hang out with the gals and the guys ofg my class started to few abit wield and so i tried to mixc up with the guys and soon i click with them ... and than again ... i fell in love with this cute little guy in my class hehehe ... i would always see him from a distance and alway hope to be with him alone and hug him ... but still i was afraid about letting people know that i a guy who likes guys which is adnormal ... and so i control and in my mind i always fantansize hugging him and having sex with him *eeks that time more mature hehehe so thing y y* but at that moment in time i thought very deeply and i told my self that i must never let people know that i like guys and dislike gals as i am afraid my classmates will boycot me ... and so i kept to myself ... soon one fine day my friends (the guys) commented that i dont look at gals at the moment in time i was so stun and i din know how to answer them ... but some how i manage to avoid to answer ... and till today i think they dunno that i like guys ... as time passes this question keep popping out of my head ... and i told myself that it is time where i should accept that i am a bisexual or a gay ...

haiz ... but thoughts after thoughts ... i could not believe i actually turn into a bisexual and finally and reluntantly i accepted that i am a bisexual ... and soon ... this question pop out in my mind ... " whats the freaking hell difference from a Bisexual and a Gay ???" ... hahaha and atthat very moment i am like so bloody confused and soon i came out with the definition of bisexual and gay haha but at the end ... the both definition still means that i am a gay .. and so finally i accepted that i am a gay ... and the day i accepted it was the day i created this blog ... 28th June 2008 ... thought i have break throught the ice barrier for admitting i am a gay ... but there is more ice barrier to be broken ... like what to do when any of my friends find out that i am a gay ? ... what if my mum finds out ? ... and many other possiblities ... hiaz ... oh well since i have chose this path i guess i have to be strong and strive along it ...

BUT HOPEFULLY ... NON OF MY FRIENDS, FAMILY MEMBER OR RELATIVE WILL EVER FIND OUT THE TRUTH THAT I AM A GAY ... AND AGAIN I WANNA APOLOGIZE TO MY MUM ... THAT I AM A DISGRACE TO U AND DAD ... AND I AM VERY SORRY ... BUT I REALLY DONT HAVE FEELINGS FOR GALS AT ALL AND I LIKE GUYS ONLY ... SORRY MUMMY ... I DONT MEAN TO KEEP IT FROM U BUT I REALLY DONT DARE TO TELL U COS U WILL BE EXTREME UPSET BOUT IT ... SO SORRY ...

HIAZ SUDDENLY FELT LIKE CRYING DUNNO WHY ... GUESS I CONFESS TOO MUCH ... BUT OH WELL I DIN SLEEP THE WHOLE NIGHT AND I AM MEETING MY DEAR LATER HEHE SO I GUESS I WILL WAIT FOR HIM TO COME AND CHEER ME UP ...

THANX FOR READING MY BLOG AND I HOPE U GUYS WHO READ COULD LEAVE SOME COMMENT IN THE SHOUT BOX ^^ LOVE ALL MY FRIENDS ESPICIALLY MY DEAR AND MY LOVELY MUMMY ^^ MUACKS

Boring saturday and guess what the silly and sexy did ?

hahaha... thought it was a saturday ... me and darick met up and we stroll to the mrt with a friend called lester hehehe ... and opposite the mrt there was a pasa malum hahahha there is this malay stall near the traffic light and to tell u the truth thier food id nice nice and superb nice hahaha i bought alof of it to eat and i was like i wanna eat more but i din bring enought cash out hahaha .... but anyway after that darick came my house awhile and we brough my dog to the stair and we sat there chatting to each other and play with my doggy hahaha ... darrick say my doggy very cute haha cos it has no tail and when it wag its tail it is like shaking its back side haha so cute ...

but anyway today we ate lotssa fooooooooooooood from the pasa malum and it was so nice hahaha but i scare were they clean when they prepared the food hahaha anyway it was kinda fun to hang out with my bro darrick and some how we can have many topics hehehe oh well it is kinda late hehehehe and my dear just got home ... u see la lol =P

ok la time for me to sleep *yawn*nites all ~ sleep well~ sleep tight ^^ Oyasumi nasai~~~~~ LOVE MY DEAR AND MY MUMMY ~~~~ I WISH THAT MY MUM WILL NEVER FIND OUT WHAT AM I AS I WANNA BE WITH HER ALWAYS ....

The Silly meets the MAD Diva ?

hehehehe ... dunno what to name my posting so i started to name my silly posting with this title ... anyway hehehe i meet my bro darick for prata hahaha and well who knows~~~ haha someone on a bike who was nice and pleasant came with us ... hehehe hi mr sweet guy nice meeting u " if u know who i am implying ~~~ *winks*" hahaha anyway we had prata and after that i suggested we go stroll and who knows mr sweet guy dont like to stroll and so i suggested to go to darrick house to see his doggy ... haha his doggy so cute ... but darrick says when ever his dog see me ... his dog so high and it like to HUMP me !!! i am like omg !!! hahaha like the day before i went to darick house ... his dog literally shave his nose at my butt i was like !!! OMG !!! hahaha and today it kept humping me from the moment it saw me and i was like OMG !!! hahaha and darick ask me WTH what smell do u have on you why my dog keep humping u haha and i say how the hell i know ...

Soon we left darrick house haha ... and i started to miss his dog but no choice we have to send this sweet little guy to get his bike and so we walk him to get hisd bike hahahaha and after that me and my bro went to the 7-11 to get ourself a drink haha and who knows when we were paying for our drink we say 2 guys ... they seems to be AJ but i dunno are thery or not ... but anyway we left 7-11 and walk to the fitness corner which was near my house and also daricks house and sat there and chat ... haha some how when we are together we have lots of thing that we two could chat about like BFs and many other stuff hahaha oh well i dunno why we just kinda click hahaha and we could talk from everything ... from gold to even shit hahaha !!! we sat there drink our drink and chat and soon we were tired and decided to go home and once i got home i showered and u should be able to guess what i did next hahaha ... which is ... putting up this post hahaha anyway it was nice to hang out with my bro and also the little sweet guy hahaha ^^

OH WELL ... it is getting late so OYASUMI NASAI ~~~~ hahahaha good night ~~~~ MUACKSSSSSSSSSSS hehehe >.<

TAKE GOOD CARE ALL MY FRIENDS ^^ AND LOVE U MY DEAR AND MY MUMMY ^^ MUACKSSSSSSSS hehehe feel free to comment in the shout box to those who read my bloggy ^^

The Silly meets the Sexy >.<

hahahaha silly title huh ? hahah anyway if u are thinking whos the silly and whose the sexy hahaha i will tell u ^^ ... i am the silly ..... who can eat hell lot and the sexy will be my bro hahaha darick *hahah if he sees me calling him sexy he will be high~~~* anyway ... just now we meet for coffee again hahha and guess what we hang out and soon i intro someone sweet by the name of daniel to my bro darick haha he he was like BLUSHING hao ma ... but any way affter chatting together for like almost to 1 hour ... daniel had to go meet his friend to collect something ... and so after daniel boarded thee bus me and my bro ... well same thing dwell around gombak as if we were the guardian there haha and we crap again ...

and soon we chat alot and some how we kinda talk bout religion ... sorry to those christian friends of mine but i dislike christian religion ... but i like u all ok hahaha ... anyway we touch on the topic abit ... and some how it link to my bro's personality ... some how the conversation links like no tomorrow haha ... but anyway imy bro of mine ... looks fierce and gigantic .. but he is super fragile hahaha so i tried to build him up hahaha but by the looks of it he is trying his best to build up so i am giving him all my support hahaha ... and i told him ... dont care what others think ... and dont get propagated so easily ... think of it deeply and than do it in actions hahaha ...

and soon it was late so we had to go home ... and who knows ... i ask my good friend ber ber how is he ... and he say ... not very goood cos his friend broke up lol ... isnt he silly hahaha but anyway it shows that he care ... but a advice to my good friends friend ... be strong ... pick up from where u fall ... in this world ... no one will help u ... cos u are the one who can help urself at times like this ... furthermore ... lasting gay relationship is hard to find ... and finding one is like finding a needle in the sea bed ~~~ haha ...

anyway ... i maybe a fool to u ... or i may be a craper , joker , idiot , stupid , silly and many others ... but when a relationship ends ... i will not be very upset or so ...cos ... some how since young i have gone throught too much painful thing and even lost someone so valueble to me ... therefore ... i have told myself i will never shed another drop of tears ... not say i dont treasure or so ...but when i am with anyone of my bfs i will treasure u give u all my love and care for as much as i can give u and even when we break i will still care for u and hope to be close friends but never be enemies ... but when i am in a relationship with u i will always put my mum first ... so dont u DARE to be jealous bout it ... hahaha dunno why but i guess it is my life and also my past which make me a very hard hearted person but have a soft heart for my family ... oh well it is running late so i guess it is time for me to orh orh ler hahaha SO OYASUMI NAHSAI ^^ hehehe

steven today i know u going to be enlist today ler GOOD LUCK AND JY hope to meet u for lunch or so when u book out over the week end !!!! JY OK !!! and tc ^^

GOOD NIGHT AND HAVE A PLEASANT DAY LATER ^^ and thanx for reading my bloggy ^^
LOVE MY DEAR AND ALL MY FRIENDS AND I LOVE U MUMMY ^^ hehe pls do leave ur comments at the shout box at ur own will

MUMMY I HOPE IF EVER U FIND OUT I AM A GAY I AM VERY SORRY BUT I HOPE U WILL ACCEPT WHO I AM AND WHAT I AM ... COS I FEEL THAT I DONT WANNA LET ANYONE TO BE LIKE U ... SO I AM VERY SORRY IF I LET U DOWN AS A SON WHO CANT MEET UR EXPECTATION TO BE A NORMAL GUY ... SORRY MUMMY I LOVE U LOTS

WAH LAO ~~~~~ (~*>3<*)~~(*^-^*~)

HAHAHAHA no title to put anyhow huntum title lol ... anyway haiz another night alone so sian ... and tomorrow is monday and my friend is starting school so sad la he just now so emo when i accidentally say the wor school lol ps la darick hahaha anyway hehehe i am so happy ^^ my mr right pass his final theory test hahaha CONGRATULATION MY DEAR MUACKS hehehe ... anyway today my and my mr right we went for lunch together hehehe and we had kinda of a interesting time together hahah i was commenting on his laksa and he say u cook la since u commetn so much and i dared him hehehe so fun ... the food was terrible ... at thew coffee shop the only nice food i find there is the soupy stall at the corner and the chicken rice hahah others re like CMI~~~ ho ho ho

anyway today ... after lunch with my mr right ~~~ i went to meet my friend darick haha he keep complaining hahah saying he salted vegetable life i was like wah ~~~ u not sway ka bah hahaha but anyway darick jyjy i will try my best to find a bf for u de if i can hohoho =P

*YAWN* so tired guess i will and rest early hehehe so good night to all sweet straw berry dreams and sleep tight ~~~~ LOVE my BABA and my MUMMY ~~~ hehehe and all my dear friends~~~~ hehehe and one more thing~~~~ BABA JIA YOU ON UR DRIVING TEST WHICH IS COMING SOON ~~~ MUACKS~~~~